Friday, September 30, 2011

53; The Difference Between Facts and Opinions (+ Giveaway update)

Overshirt: Vantage Point Vintage • Top: JC Penny • Shorts: Forever21 • Belt: Etsy • Boots: Etsy • Jewelery: Crescent moon pendant (Omen in Salem), pendulum (DIY), sapphire engagement ring (fiancée)

Recently I've run into some...disagreements on a little personal style community page I visit every so often to post my looks to, a place where I've met some pretty awesome people, including one of my favourite bloggers, Louise of Art and Ghosts. Where the negativity that I'm seeing that was not present a month ago is being generated from, I am not entirely sure. People feel compelled to post their disapproving remarks to a few of my outfits and either don't offer many suggestions -- just plainly saying "I don't like it" -- or suggest that I change my style completely. I've been told that my most recent outfit is "unwearable" in terms of social practicality -- and yet, twice have I seen two seperate women there post outfits wearing black lace seethrough tops (one being a body suit) bearing it all, and the general reaction was enthusiasm and approval (except for a few polite remarks that perhaps it wasn't entirely appropriate to wear in public, but nothing as abrasive as what I've been treated to).

I'm kind of lost on the idea that one person's opinions on fashion can and is used like a piece of fact. What's more, I don't understand why some people feel compelled to be rude, either. Just last night before turning in, I received a comment on said page from someone on my most recent outfit, and the comment was simply: "Ahahaha, what" -- without any identifiable context, or punctuation for that matter. Yes, "what", exactly? I am dying to know.

This isn't me just having a hard time taking criticism -- I don't get dressed every day trying to figure out what combination of clothes will make the most people like me. Clothes and fashion are an art form to me; I wear what looks interesting for my enjoyment, whether or not it's 'conventional', so if people wish to voice that they think my outfits are terrible, I am completely open to it. What rubs me the wrong way is when people suggest I change to fit their style preferences, or choose to respond with catty, immature remarks. Some people just can't fathom respect for other people, and I suppose it has to do with the sense of 'anonymity' that sitting behind a computer screen can give someone. A person's opinion on a matter is not fact, especially when it comes to personal style.

I know, it's just the internet and most of it is bull anyway, but that doesn't make the negativity any less annoying. Its irritation may only reach the equivalent of a mosquito bite on my conscience, but it still lingers a bit to get on my nerves.

I simply wanted to write this out so that what little audience I have here will take a moment to observe one of the pitfalls of fashion blogging on the internet. My resolution to this problem? I'm leaving the site. I know I will be tempted to go back after a while, as it is on a website that I have been on for years (Livejournal), but lately most communities have been filling up with very negative people anyway, and has since made my visits to LJ much less rewarding this year.

I just hope that you who are reading this will, in the future, will be respectful of others when trying to put across to them that, for example, what they're wearing is less than favourable, and choose to say so to help them, not to aggravate them. However, I doubt I will have to do much convincing to those who read my blog, as I've only ever seen respect and support from you lovely people. ♥

Onto more important issues: the winner of the pendulum necklace will be...drawn tomorrow, because I mucked up on another website where I posted about the event, and said the winner would be drawn on Saturday, which is tomorrow. I would rather not be unfair to anyone finding out about this giveaway through that website. I am dumb, I know. Sorry!

Also, it seems to be that my page links beneath my blog's header image are missing. Gahh.


  1. I love your style! I can't believe people would be so rude like that. And I've already entered your giveaway... fingers crossed:)

  2. There are and always will be people judging the way others look, don't worry about them they're just stupid and don't even deserve that you pay attention to them. Just think about all the people who love your style and the way YOU are! :)

    Love your overshirt btw, so pretty! :)

  3. I've noticed an influx of negativity in LJ communities, too. My switch to DW is more and more validated. :P

  4. you have a unique rock and roll style that is great! dont worry about the negative comments. they are contributing to your blog traffic which only makes your blog more popular so they are the ones losing out. you can easily delete a comment so they lose!
    / twitter: @opinionslave

  5. Question: Why don't you smile more in pictures? I know the convention is that Models Don't Smile but... that... doesn't make sense to me.

  6. Thanks you guys! ♥

    Ria; I honestly hope Dreamwidth gains more users, because all of the communities I want to join are all empty! In the meantime, I think I'll just stick to the few communities I already know that aren't full of jerks...which are mainly the Sailor Moon ones.

    Eli; I...don't know. D: More often than not, I go through the pictures that Kathryn takes and the ones where I'm smiling make my cheeks look funny. Like, bad funny. I think I just need to learn how to smile and make it look less forced. I've been practicing with what muscles make my face look dumb, and which ones don't. #iamputtingtoomucheffortintothis

  7. Kat, it's like Oscar Wilde said, "Everything popular is wrong." The more people hate what you do, the more you are probably onto something really good! I tend to look at the source of the negativity, also. Sometimes, I just want to say, "Yeah, well I hate what you're wearing, too, but the difference is that I don't feel the need to SAY it!"

    Do you know a girl on Tumblr once reblogged a picture of me and added the comment, "I don't like her face." Really? You don't like my FACE? I mean, geez. Tough luck, lady. I'm kinda stuck with it, and I do the best I can. I guess what I'm saying is haters gonna hate.

    Also, I tried winged eyeliner with pencil once and it looked like I was in kindergarten drawing on my face with Crayolas. Maybe you will have better luck? I am not exactly the most precise person in the world...more "forest" than "trees".

    Keep on keepin' on, sister!

  8. Oh hey, Madeline! I typically find no point in telling someone that I don't like any certain thing of theirs, unless it's to offer some advice or help, and even then I don't ever word it to show my dislike, because...well, as I said, I don't find a point to it. It then baffles me that people choose to react that way and never offer any constructive comments. Do people just enjoy ragging on others? I'll never understand it.

    Fff, they're obviously visually impaired, because you have an awesome face. It's really unique and very pretty. Alas, it is one person out of...god, hundreds of people who love you!

    I actually expect it to look hideous, but mainly because it's not one of those kinds you can sharpen with a pencil (but instead, you twist the end and it pops out, and has a permanent rounded tip). I may try liquid liner once again someday, but I strayed from it after trying it in high school and always messing it up. I too am a bit clumbsy with my hands. You should see my serial killer handwriting sometime... Or, maybe it's best if you didn't. No one should be subjected to that.