18; Will you afford me a small ego boost?

So, I didn't make it to 'the top fifty' for the Maurices Main Street Model search... However, it was pretty awesome to see my most recent look up on the front page for Chictopia:

(Left-most under 'Street Style Photo Blogs'.) It seems to me that this is because it was the most recent under the Style Gallery (since the two other photos preceeded mine in entering the Style Gallery) but at the same time, four more photos have been added to the Style Gallery since. Is the site just slow at updating? Eh, I don't care. Being on the front page of a website just feels good, damn it. ♥

This also means I may or may not have been on the front page before, since I discovered just this evening that my secondmost recent look on Chictopia made it into the style gallery, so it's possible that this has happened before and I just didn't notice.

I'm beginning to like Chictopia over Lookbook lately. Lookbook seems over-crowded and it's hard to get exposure there. I used to hang out in the forums a lot but the only lengthy discussions that happen there were people arguing. Otherwise, people there don't seem to want to invest a lot of thought into the discussions. At Chictopia, there's enough people there for users to get a lot of exposure if they deserve it, but not so many people that the site is overflowing with looks. It seems like Lookbook gets backed up with too many looks and drowns out some great posts. It's kind of disappointing. Unfortunately, Chictopia's forums are pretty slow moving...

Gah, where the heck did that ramble come from?

17; Outfit post, and a really horrifying end to yesterday.

Kimono: ShockBotique courtesy of Jean Greige | Top: Maurices | Shorts: thrifted | Shoes: Maurices | Belt: Etsy | Necklaces: California mall (Om) and Texas botique (mother of pearl pendant) | Purse: antique store

[Lookbook]
[Chictopia]

I took Kathryn out for dinner yesterday evening and we ate at our favourite café. She took the latter shot there while fiddling with my camera. She was going to do the outfit pictures there but a rush of people showed up, and even I was a bit self-conscious about the idea of having my picture taken around that many people in the same room. So we left, got coffee elsewhere, and Kathryn dragged me into a hidden breezeway-alley-thing that I never knew about and suggested we do the pictures there. I actually want to do my pictures there, because it's typically that empty all the time, Kathryn says. I love how it looks; it looks like a little hidden piece of Boston.

And here's where I bring the whole mood crashing down.

Minutes after we left this alley-thing, we were taking our usual route home and saw a cat across the street that looked suspiciously like our outdoor cat Gypsy. Kathryn pointed it out and said, "I've never seen that cat before," noting the fact that we've only ever seen three outdoor cats in our town before -- two black ones, and one orange and white one. This dark stripped cat began running across a yard and onto the sidewalk, and Kathryn and I heard a car driving up the lane. The cat seemed to think it could outrun the car, and it bolted into the lane, but it wasn't fast enough (neither were Kathryn and I to stop the car), and the cat was struck.

It was the single most horrifying thing I've ever witnessed. It laid there in the lane, and died there while we were there, and I just screamed and cried. We crossed the street, and Kathryn stood in the lane to keep other cars from running it over, and she called her father when we thought it was our cat Gypsy. At one point, a man drove by and asked if the cat had a collar, because it looked like his cat and it had run away recently, but when we said we thought it was our cat, he drove off.

Fortunately and unfortunately, Kathryn's dad showed up and said he saw Gypsy on the porch when he left the house, so it wasn't our cat. Still, it's someone's cat, possibly that man's who drove by. A woman who lived in a nearby house gave us something to lay it on to get it out of the road, and we told her that it wasn't our cat and that it may have been that man's, and we left it with her.

We were so broken up about the whole thing. Kathryn's reactions were delayed, which was good because I was able to console her once I'd calmed down. Once we got home, we spent time with all three of our cats, even though Gypsy is the one outdoor cat. Luckily, she's very smart and runs out of the street as soon as she hears a car start. Still, we're really worried about keeping her outside, but it's not even our decision, but her parents' decisions.

I'm still not sure what I feel about it all. I have a really rocky idea about life and death, so I don't know how to handle death or the death of a small little creature like that. I just remind myself of what my ideas are, and that I believe that cat is elsewhere now, somewhere where pain and physical experiences don't exist, and it's at peace.

16; Can it be -- an outfit post?!

Sweater: thrifted | Jeans: thrifted/DIY | Belt: Etsy | Shoes: Maurices | Bag: antique store | Jewlery: everywhere

[Chictopia]
[Lookbook]

Well, isn't this something I haven't done in a while? It's been so cold, though, and I don't have any 'fashionable' winter clothing. Since October I've been muddling about in the same few pairs of jeans and piling sweaters, baggy sweatshirts, and blankets on until I've made myself a fluffy coccoon -- which isn't something anyone wants to see.

It was surprisingly warm today, and I wasn't really expecting it. (Despite my choice to wear this.) Or, well...I sort of was. See, yesterday Weather.com said it would be 74 degrees on Tuesday. I was ecstatic. I checked again this morning, and it said the high was to be 62 (and cloudy). When I went out at noon to walk Kathryn home from work, it was ten degrees colder than that, and it felt pretty chilly. However, I knew it wasn't the warmest part of the day, and at three this afternoon the sun had finally come out to play. About an hour later, we decided to hit Dunkin' Donuts for some coffee, and it was so warm! I was so happy; I missed feeling so warm while walking around outside.

My point is, had I known it would have been so warm, I probably would have worn my pretty velvet kimono instead -- if I was able to decide what top to wear with it. I've had this dilemma for some days now. I like to plan outfits out when I buy a certain piece, but this kimono's had me stumped. I think I know what to wear with it, though...'I think' being the operative term. Tomorrow should be in the seventies though, so maybe I'll be able to harrass Kathryn into another walk downtown and if so, maybe I'll wear the kimono then. ♥

But before Kathryn and I trekked downtown today, we ordered Chinese food!

It kind of turned out like a picnic in bed, even though I was the only one on the bed. I'd made room for Kathryn's sister, but she decided to sit on the floor next to Kathryn, who was in the desk chair. Jasmine kept harrassing us and sticking her face in the container of scallion pancakes. We had vegetable tempura, vegetable chop suey, vegetable fried rice, and the former pancakes that I mentioned. Oh -- and a side of white rice. Can you tell that we're all vegetarians yet?

I ADORE VEGETABLE TEMPURA RIGHT NOW. As well as scallion pancakes, so long as they come with that pink-orange sweet sauce that you see in the bottom left hand corner. I want to eat that every day. ♥

15; Oh man.

Friendly reminder: voting for the Maurices Main Street Model ends on Sunday~


I have been so terrible at blogging lately, haven't I? I've kind of been terrible at just being on the internet in general in the past week or so. I'm switching jobs at the moment, and don't feel really great at my current one, and I've only had one day of floor training at my new one, so I'm feeling anxious about that one too. It's also suddenly gone cold here again, meaning all of the lovely warm weather clothes I've accumulated have to stay in the closet while I sit and shiver in ugly thermal shirts under lumpy sweatshirts that make me feel like a hobo. This is pretty darn cold for April, even in New England. I'm not happy.

However, I am happy about the warm weather clothing I mentioned earlier. While it's a complete letdown that I can't even go near it for possibly another two or three weeks (come on, unexpected heat wave... ;___; ), I still have some really amazing newbies to my closet.

Firstly, I bought this from DisarmingDarling:

...Which I'll admit, I was a little nervous about it's length, as a dress. I've never worn something that short before in my life. However, I tried it on when it arrived and was embarrased to discover that the hem comes about an inch or two above my knees. :| I'm such a freaking drawf. At least this means I don't have to worry about looking incredibly indecent around Kathryn's parents...

(Fun fact: this dress came with the original tag, where it was valued at $158.00 back when it was new. This is officially the most expensive thing I own.)

Then, I won this velvet kimono in Madeline's ShockBotique giveaway:

I'm still kind of in denial that I won it, despite the fact that I laid in bed with it clutched to my chest when it arrived on Wednesday. I'm also shocked that it fit me. I suppose Madeline and I are roughly the same size, because every time I buy something, I look at the model wearing it and think, "okay, so imagine they're wearing that but two sizes larger...and that's what it'll look like on me." I tried it on, expecting the tassels to drag on the floor by like, two inches, and be subjected to Jasmine's terror, but it didn't! It's like a dream come true. ♥

(...How obnoxious would it look if I wore that dress and this kimono together? Too much velvet? Too much brown?)

I also got my Maurices wedges...and then I bought this tank top, as you know. Which, looking at the shorts the model is wearing, I'm really digging the black pleather with it. But me, in leather shorts? No. Some people can pull it off, but I'd feel weird. I have seen Madeline wear black wet look pants (...I make a lot of references to her, don't I? Is that bad?) and make them look really awesome, though. It makes me wonder if I can pull them off. (Or, more appropriately, put them on. *shot* I'm terrible, I know.)

Still, that's a pretty edgy piece of clothing for my kind of personality. I'd also have to justify the purchase with, "what else can I wear this with?" Then there's shopping for them...I can buy them online (if I can find an affordable pair) but then I can't try them on. It's all very confusing. I'll have to do a lot of researching and thinking about it. Still, I can't get the mental picture of that tank top with those wet look pants out of my head, and I love it so much.

I ordered an extra small, and I'm hoping what arrives will be an extra small. With the length of that tank, I'm worried it'll be too long to wear shorts with. Normally I'd think, "just tuck the shirt in then," but I worry that looks dumb when I do it. I do have some shorts that might go with the top (some black-faded-to-the-point-of-charcoal-grey cut offs) so hopefully all works out when it arrives. It says FedEx should deliver it on the 25th...but that in itself doesn't make sense, because it's only in Northboro ('departed from location' so possibly even closer), which is a short drive from here. Hell, it could reasonably get here today. WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO KEEP US APART, FEDEX? WHAT'S WITH YOU?

Next time on 'A Blog No One Reads,' I'll be making a post about ponchos, and bitch about how expensive they are. ♥

14; This is where I become a total geek.

I had been shopping on Lulu*s daydreaming as if I had enough money for anything on their site (well, I guess I kind of do, but I really have trouble lately with finding anything I like immediately) and stumbled upon this amazing tank top:

Insight's "Chakra" tank -- not pictured: chakras, interestingly enough, but it's showing what appears to be some awesome depiciton of what I initially gathered was a woman ascending into nirvana or something to that effect, which still won points with me. I can dig that. Plus the artwork's pretty awesome and I love the colours.

However...it's $45.00. I can't dig that.

So, I threw it into my Amazon wishlist, knowing no one would look (probably because I haven't linked it anywhere in a while) and I might not ever spend that much money (god know's how much the grand total would be with shipping).

The next morning I'm scrolling through my Amazon wishlist to check up on how much the camera I'm planning to buy is when I see this tank, and Kathryn's home, so I decide to show it to her. With her behind me on the bed, she asks me to pull up the close-up image of the tank, and proceeds to ask me, "what god is that?"

I blink. I hadn't really thought to ask myself that question when I looked at it the day before. I look back at the image, trying to overlook what looks to me to be a woman, for some clues. Maybe it's Lakshmi or something, y'know? Lets see, seven-headed snake, a conch shell in the right hand, oh look, a symbolic chakra (discus) in the left...

...Oh wait, it's Vishnu. Well, hell yeah! Suddenly, $45.00 is a price I'm willing to pay  for this tank; why? I seriously, really love Vishnu. Out of all the gods, even out of the the Creator (Brahma), the Preserver (Vishnu), and the Destroyer (Shiva), Vishnu's my favourite. I love the stories about him and his kindness towards humanity and the creatures that they share the earth with. He's this overall nice guy who protects everyone and is basically the most compassionate dude around. And yet, he isn't above having to actually fight if need be. (As seen in his incarnation, Rama, who's totally badass.)

I just really like this certain god. (I may even have a couple of more personal reasons for liking him.) Though, my second favourite is Ganesha, because he and his story are just so adorable...once you get past Shiva having decapitated him as a kid (mostly by mistake) and then having to find him a replacement head, which explains why he's depicted with an elephant head. Otherwise, he's kind of like "the ICanHasCheezburger? of Hinduism." (In Kathryn's words.)

But I digress. This tank top and I were fated  to be mated, and guess where I found it for $37.50? I worry a small won't fit, though (going off of Lulu*s measurement of a small) and yet, this site offers an extra small...but why doesn't Lulu*s? Did they sell out, or not order extra smalls? Well, whatever. I'll place the order next week for an extra small and hope it all works out.

Now, if I can find an online coupon for free shipping, or something...


EDIT: well, a size 2 (small) sold out on Lulu*s. Now I'm worried it'll sell out on the other site before next week. Geesh...I do have enough money for it, I'd just rather not spend that much at the moment. We'll see what I decide.

EDIT 2: okay, I ordered it...only because I have this bad luck about waiting to buy something and going back to find it's gone.

13; Things -- but not interesting things.

Last Friday (I think?), I awoke to my right ear being completely blocked up by something, limiting my hearing by A LOT. I've yet to figure out what's going on. When presssing (gently) on my ear, it doesn't feel hard or soild, so I guess it's wax in my ear cannal. I'd see my doctor, but...I've yet to even meet the PCP my insurance assigned me, and my luck, I even can't find the paperwork stating what the woman's name is. I called a handful of numbers to see if someone could look her name up, but I've been disconnected, left on hold for lengthy amounts of time, or have talked to people who have redirected me elsewhere. Thus, I'm just going to pick a new doctor and see them ASAP.

Luckily, I've done my own research and it's sounding like it's related to my allergies -- which I would believe, because my nasal passages are constantly stuffy. I'm very allergic to dust, you see, and there's a lot of it in the world. Also, my hearing's gotten a bit better in that ear.

Unluckily, the ear has begun to ring...a lot. You know, that constant high pitched ringing you get when you're in a loud environment and suddenly everything goes quiet? I have that now. Looking that up, it seems that's definitely related to what I have, and could be due to a lot of things...one of them being stress. To be honest, I think that's the cause. I've been so strung out lately, slacking off on quite a few things in favour of lying in bed doing nothing, because I don't have the energy to face anything. I put off too many things, really, and I've been extremely stressed out. I never handle stress well. (This will explain why I have been barely posting to this blog; you may have noticed this, or you may have not.)

--Well, it could also be because I used to have constant popping in that ear a couple of years ago, but that stopped a long time ago, and I haven't had issues since.

...Yeah, I know: get thee to a doctor.

12; Maurices Main Street Model voting

So, voting has started for Maurices Main Street Model. There are SO many contestants, I'm really surprised. Fifty per page, out of eleven pages (and I think the last page has forty-nine)... Yeah, that's a lot.

You can view my profile (and even vote for me, if you think I'm deserving of it) here: http://www.mauricesmainstreetmodel.com/4922/christianna-tilley

Voting is going until the 24th. Vote for somebody, at least!


...And yeah, that's all I've got for thist post. I woke up twenty minutes ago, see.

11; Errands turn into a date downtown ♥

So my fiancée Kathryn needed to go downtown today to the notary with her massage therapy application. She'd been wanting to get a ride down to the notary office, but today was such a nice day that she asked me if I felt like hiking down there on foot. Naturally, I said yes. (I need the exercise.) Again, being such a nice day, and with her being in such a good mood lately, she asked if I also wanted to get lunch at our favourite café afterward. Once again, I agreed.

So, I decided that I wanted to dress up. I've been loving the maxi dress I bought from Disarming Darling on her eBay store and wanted to wear it while the weather was cooperating. It's been getting warmer these days, and I've been all sorts of excited.

We went downtown, got the notary business done, hit the ATM, and I pulled out some cash because I realised that I missed our one local antique store and wanted to see how much it had changed in the year since I last visited.

Where we ate is the Wholesome café, one of the best little places I've ever eaten. They make everything with organic and/or locally grown ingredients, and many things are made from scratch. I had the super delicious California Wrap, made of spinach, sprouts, cucumber, goat cheese, carmellized onions, and pesto in a wheat wrap. I...can't remember what Kathryn got. It's called 'The Veggie' but to my understanding, it was basically the same (spinnach and sprouts) but with carrot and...other things. It was also on Ezekiel bread. We also got the best damned blueberry smoothie ever created.

After that, we hit the antique store, and I found a lovely purse for only five bucks!

Our vantage point at our current favourite table.

This is a blueberry smoothie done right. Made from scratch with almond milk and rice-based ice cream. It's pretty damn amazing.

Lookbook | Chictopia

(Ugh, weird face.) The dress I bought from Disarming Darling. Had to hem up the bottom and the straps, so it fits a lot better now. You can't tell, but I'm also wearing that silver antique ear cuff that I was bidding on in that one post I made about ear cuffs. I really love this dress. ♥

The five dollar purse. Had to cut the strap down which made the leather a little funky there, but no big deal. It's a really cute bag. I worship upholstery-style floral print.

And this post is going to be a little short, because our internet is being really dumb tonight and is taking forever to do the simplest of tasks. God knows when I'll be able to update Lookbook or Chictopia.

1o; Something of possible importance. (And something that isn't.)

Okay, big news out of the way: a store chain called Maurices (that I adore; it inspired my initial interest in clothes) has teamed up with Lifetime (yes, the television channel) and is having a special kind of model search. They want girls of all body types and want to get their hometown in on the whole thing by awarding the town $7,500 for a 'makeover' of their own. The models selected in the end will model their looks for this years fall and holiday campaigns, as well as for spring 2012. (And a few other things, too.) Applications are being accepted until tomorrow. (More technical info here.)

So, this morning I...sent in my application, which involved two 200+ word blurbs about 1. why I want to become a Maurices model and 2. what I like about my place of residence and how I like to give back, and a YouTube video (no, I'm not linking to it; and no, you won't find it on my channel), among other little things.

Voting will take place April 10 - 24th for the top fifty contestants, who will be announced on April 28th. After that, Maurices selects twenty of them, flies them out for a casting call, and the final twelve will be announced on May 9th.

Oh man, do I want to be one of the twelve winners so badly! I love this store chain so much, both for the style and quality of clothes, and the customer service. The whole experience would be really amazing.


And speaking of Maurices, I couldn't help it: I had to buy these wedges.

Mainly because these were originally $39.00, and were on sale for $19.50, and I also had an online coupon and ended up saving seven bucks off shipping, so the whole thing was $21.55. That's cheaper than the black boots I wear all the time. My sneakers I wear otherwise were $19.99, I think? I mean, I haven't been able to find decent wedges for that much without shipping. I just really had to pounce while they were still around, especially since I've been aching for a pair for months now. Here's hoping they fit when they arrive!

o9; An aimless rambling or two...

Hope no one minds that this is about to become a more personal blog for this post, due to a lack of interesting things to talk about. (Not that many people read, but I can pretend I'm catering to an audience, right?)

First, I joined Chictopia. Ogad.

Did some reconstructive work with the dress I bought from Disarming Darling. Hemmed up the straps and the skirt, and it fits a lot better now. I'm thinking of taking in the sides at the bust, as they sag a bit on me, but at this point in the year I'd be crazy to wear the dress without an extra layer or two of clothes, so it's no big deal at the moment. I want to head out to the woods to do a shoot, but I don't know if I'm feeling it today. I would rather hike downtown with a buddy and do a shoot there, but Kathryn works until three and will be tired and want to shower...which is totally understandable, considering she works at a Dunkin' Donuts. (She's gone in on her off days to pop into the back of the store for a minute, and has come back out smelling strongly of coffee and donuts. The scent is scary potent back there.)

We both have tomorrow off, but I feel weird asking people to take pictures of me. I don't know what it is, I just feel silly. Maybe it's because I have a certain 'vision' of how I want the photos to look and I need to constantly fuss with my camera, take test shots of where I'm going to stand to get the best lighting, and take a crapton of photos... I feel uncomfortable asking someone else to go through all that work, especially when I'm not sure if they're as into the whole process and end result as I am. I could ask Kathryn's sister if borrowing her tripod would be all right, but then I'd look kinda dumb standing in the middle of a sidewalk downtown setting up a tripod and then running in front of it to strike a pose, and doing this twenty times over the course of thirty minutes. Having someone else to do it makes it look more 'normal' somehow, like 'two kids just messing around, having fun'... It's a very vicious cycle, especially since my camera insists that it can't see a thing unless I'm outside. So I'm at a loss.

I'm very over-aware of myself, aren't I? Oy.

--Oh, speaking of Disarming Darling, I'm bidding on another dress she has listed. (Snakeskin-print velvet mini-dress!) I'm stupidly excited, and I'm fairly confident that this one will fit me like a glove. (Or...I hope so. Actually, the waist size for it is like, an inch smaller than my actual waist. Looks like I'm going to be doing bicycle crunches every day to make sure it fits if I do end up winning it.) And being a mini-dress, I could always wear a long skirt over it, which would look pretty awesome. Listing ends in five days; cross your fingers?


Onward to more interesting things, that denim shirt I wore in my last look? I cut off the sleeves. I keep seeing denim vests and decided I needed one. I also got my pyramid studs yesterday in the mail. They're a little smaller than I was hoping for, but they're still studs, so they'll still work. (I was going to use them on a leather jacket, but being so small, they'll be harder to stick on, so I'll just use the excess to stud some pants or something.) I also think I'm going to stitch a patch onto it as well. I have a peace sign one that I've had for a couple of years that I think will go nicely. Then I will utilise Madeline's shredding tutorial she posted to youtube, because my attempt failed last week and I want my revenge.

I also have rediscovered my Elvis Presley replica army jacket that I bought at Graceland a year and a half ago. (It looks vaguely like this, but shorter and with different patches on the sleeves. Even though I can find the website for the guy who designed the jacket, I can't find pictures of it ANYWHERE.) I've been washing it over and over again in every laundry load we do to help break it in, but the material is so...stiff. I'm trying to think of other ways to make it more comfortable to wear. I might have to google something or maybe tie it to the back of the car and drive around. I feels bulky and yet doesn't look quite so. It's very bizarre. I want to be able to wear it comfortably, so I'll be working on that as well.


Ugh, boring post is boring. This is what work does to a girl. I need to take a walk. Maybe I'll run into someone downtown and pay them to take pictures for me. -shot-